Raggedy Start, Decent End

Well, this morning I had high hopes for church.
My poor beleaguered gut had a different agenda.
Guts won. No church for me.
Later said gut allowed me out to do errands.
Thus continued the scramble and search for 100% Aloe Vera Gel - which has been a wonderful balm for my radiated skin.
My original bottle was from Trader Joe. Their brand. Which, it turns out, they only make 'seasonally', and the 'season' is over.
Next stop, Walgreen's. I had seen some aloe gel on line at their store, but no, it had alcohol and stuff in it.
Next?? back home, called a Trader Joe store near St V's. Nope. None left. None in the warehouses.
However, the nice staffer there suggested New Seasons.
Yep. Right down the street. I called, they had, I went. But they didn't have. But they will have. Tomorrow.
I will not whine. I will not complain. I am grateful there is any 100% aloe gel to be had anywhere, never mind just down the street. Besides, it's the only place to get Chocolate Rice Dream, and I need to lay in a few more of those before . .

Chemo starts up again . . . tomorrow.
Back to sludgy, and sleepy (even more sleepy??) and oh, forget the rest.


I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:13

Un - Wilt

Well, I am pleased to report that today felt reasonably normal and my energy seems to have returned - enough to manage the activities of daily living, including errands, house maintenance, laundry - that sort of thing. Did NOT get to work. Hopefully my energy will be there again tomorrow and I can get some very important me-only chores done there.

This is from two days ago:

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Went out on the deck and pulled hair and tossed it to the breeze. I do not like to look at how much I'm getting. I just pull for awhile, stick my hat back on and continue my day. There is still enough sticking out of the hat, and a quick peek at my reflection in the sliding door reveals there is still enough hair to be far from bald. So, thanking God for small favors, I go on with the day.

I've done this for two more days. Strange morning ritual. I don't think I'm quite getting tufts anymore, which means I will have hair enough to frame my face under the hat, at least until sometime after chemo 2 when the cycle of hair loss may start again. 

Oh, and I managed a little shopping yesterday. A few new hats from the local Thrift Store, although the adventure ended abruptly with an episode of runs. These drain my energy every time. Just one episode today, which is why my energy is back, I think.

It is good to praise the Lord and make music to your name, O Most High,

to proclaim your love in the morning and your faithfulness at night,

to the music of the ten-stringed lyre and the melody of the harp.

For you make me glad by your deeds, O Lord; I sing for joy at the works of your hands.

How great are your works, O Lord, how profound your thoughts!

Psalm 92:1-5

Tomorrow is church. Maybe I will be able to sing a few praise songs, since my mouth is all the way healed.

Encouragement

It started out discouraging enough.
Hair is still coming out in tufts, although it is amazing that there is at least enough to look nice poking out from under a hat. I am rather vain about my hair and have started wearing a hat 24/7. Yeah, last night I slept with my hat on. I don't like the look of me with increasingly wispy hair, or the feel of it either.
Um, and then there's been the runs that have refused to respond to the 'brat' (banana, rice, applesauce & toast) diet.

Dr. H, Radiologist, is the encouragement star of today.
He said, just take an Imodium (anti diarrhea) pill for your runs. Bought the stuff, took a pill immediately, and have not had an episode yet. Man, having the runs was debilitating - I amazed and grateful for the simple fix. Hooray for drugs.
Then, he said I am doing extremely well tolerating the radiation treatments. As in my skin is in good shape. It's nothing I have any control over, except maybe for faithfully applying aloe gel to the affected area, so, really, I have God to thank for giving me a body that is tolerating radiation unusually well.
Tomorrow officially begins the second half (more or less) of radiation treatments. Of course, this means the more difficult half. But I'm doing well! Praise God and focus on one day at a time.
Four more days before chemo starts again. Praise God and focus on one day at a time.

Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that."

James 4:13-15

Wilt

Tired - a bit wilted, as it were.
The flowers from work are doing better than I am, although they are showing early signs of wilt.
I'm not walkin' as fast.
Still choosing the stairs though!
Restin' and sleepin'
Doin' a puzzle or two.
Watchin' part of a ball game. Darwin Barney, Murray Hill LL Alum, plays second base for the Chicago Cubs. Saw one at bat. He struck out. Looking.
Ready for bed.
Zzzz

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;

In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Hair Today, Hair Tomorrow?

Lots of hair gone again today, but, amazingly, it still looks OK.
I have yet to see the legendary huge wad of hair on my pillow that I have heard about so often. For me, it's sort of like brushing the cat. I brush, out comes hair, and I hope that keeps the shedding down during the day. With the cat, when I brush her she leaves less hair all over the place and doesn't get hair balls. Glad I am not under threat of hairballs!

The apostle Paul writes these challenging and encouraging words in Philippians 4:11-13
I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, weather well fed or hungry, weather living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength. 

Hair loss, impending chemo, increasing radiation discomfort -  

Psalm 121

I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from?

My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip - he who watches over you will not slumber;

Indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord watches over you - the Lord is your shade at your right hand;

The sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all harm - he will watch over your life;

The Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Boring?

Without the adventures of the baseball team to add spice to this blog it is in danger of becoming a litany of symptoms. Thankfully, I have only one symptom worth mentioning.

That would be hair, shedding at an accelerated rate. Three weeks after chemo. Yuck. I still have enough to look ok, but I how much more will go in the days ahead and I wonder about what round two of chemo will do. Maybe I'm one of the chosen few who will loose a lot of hair. All of it? What ever. I'm sure I will cope. But it is not pleasant seeing the amount of hair that's come out the past two days.

To those of you who may have prayed, I made it to the office today and logged a productive three hours. Thank you! I had just the right amount of energy, and took care of all the 'have-to's' but one. I had intended to go yesterday, but an unscheduled nap and a couple of longish phone calls made mincemeat of that intention.

My biggest challenge is strategizing for chemo treatment 2. Things to get done before it starts. Supplies to lay in. I guess that's it. Just two lists. Not too bad.

Well, that is about all there is to my life these last two days.
I am very grateful that there is nothing awful in it.
I am most grateful that I feel basically OK. Tired and somewhat sore, but OK.
Grateful there's not more than 10 (maybe more like 5!) hours of work per week that has to be done by me. Grateful for the others who are willing and can understand and do the rest of the work!
Most of all grateful that what ever comes my way in life, God is Lord over all of it and is there to carry me through, as a shepherd carries a wounded lamb.
All praise and thanksgiving be to our Lord, God and Savior, Jesus Christ!

We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield.

In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name.

May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you.

Psalm 33:20-22

Relatively Easy Days

Relatively easy days, although the couch is still the venue of choice.
There is a seemingly endless amount of internet stuff to do.
I still haven't begun to read a book. What has the world come to?
Much of the ease is attributable to ibuprofen.
Actually managed to take the car to the shop, work three hours, and get rad zapped.
Then I came home to my couch and slept!

Yesterday the we had the End of Season party for the Murray Hill Little League All Stars.
It was a nice party and a good closing event for them.
The food was great, and I ate too much.

This is a link to a local news story about the championship game:

http://www.beavertonvalleytimes.com/sports/story.php?story_id=131126818872317500

Or, just Google: beaverton valley times July 21, 2011 raleigh hills.
It is a short account, but mentions all the plays, including Kaleo's 'perfect' bunt.

Treasuring the nine more days I have before chemo starts again.
Oncology says I should get about the same reactions. Radiology (Dr. Lu) rolled her eyes and said, you are more run down from the first treatment and from the radiology treatments and it will likely be worse.
So I'm planning on holing up, drinking liquid food and swishing with mouth-number and sleeping as much as possible and using my brain as little as possible until it's over.

If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.

If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,

Even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.

Psalm 139:8-10

What's Cool about Root Canals

Here's what:

• You get to hang out with fun people.
• You get to snooze in the dentist chair.
• Your tooth gets fixed.
• You get ibuprofen, which helps with other bodily discomforts as well as the sore tooth.
• You get the rest of the day off. Sort of. I did take a 1.5 hour nap though.

All is well. Enforced ibuprofen came at a good time. People were telling me, 'you know, you can take over the counter pain meds . .' Of course macho me would have none of it, but now the radiated area does indeed feel better.

Still grieving a bit for the extended baseball summer that got away. Their end of the season party is tomorrow. Way too soon. Well, kudos to those scrappy little giant killers from Raleigh Hills. Other grandmas are rejoicing, and working to fit a trip or two to Bend into their schedules.

Earlier, in the morning I had a serious burst of energy, and took it out on the house. Cleaned a toilet. When ever I do this, I always remember my friend Laurie E. The verse that follows had been part of a Bible study we did together back when her three boys were small, and she felt like her life was about cleaning toilets . . . So here's our verse for the day -

What ever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

Colossians 3:23-24

A New Day.

Baseball: I'm praying for the boys - that they are processing well. They were the giants that got killed by the little guy. That's a new experience for probably everyone involved. I'm praying for the coaches too - that they can work through and understand their own issues and be there to give wise support for the boys.

Mouth: Still improving from the dreadful mouth sores. Yesterday I was finally able to care for my teeth properly. Brushed them and did all the extras FOUR times yesterday. They actually seem to be bouncing back fairly well. Except for poor tooth #31. I went to see Dr J, my regular dentist, and he (and I) believe the best choice for the tooth is to have a root canal. It's been set up for tomorrow at 12:30. Lets pray that it is successful. I have had one prior root canal from Dr. AJ and I liked him very much. He has amazing (to me) state of the art technology. Oh, and he's a nice man too.

Radiation: Entering the second third of treatments, when effects begin to become noticeable. So far just feel intermittently sore/scratchy.

Chemo: As I said, my mouth is continuing to get better. Although there are lingering sores I can eat just about anything. Dang. Time to get back onto the portion control regimen, for my appetite is baaaack . . .

Life: Baseball loss stings. I was so looking forward to following them in person or remotely as health would permit. Now it's over. OK - now there is a vacuum where baseball used to be. I will pray I recognize what is there waiting to fill it. Something with passion, maybe? I would like that. What ever it is, I pray I will be given passion for it!

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ - for the glory and praise of God.
Philippians 1:9-11

Baseball Season Has Ended.

The boys played well. It was an even match up. The championship wasn't meant to be for Murray Hill. Neighboring Raleigh Hills will represent District 4 at the State Tournament at Bend.
Sure is late. G'nite all.

Rain Out.

A lovely rainy day. Pouring rain, actually.
Ball game will be played tomorrow, first pitch at 7:45PM.
It was great to go to church, visit with a lot of folks, and worship God with them.
Then I got all sorts of stuff done around the house and such.
Darn near normal for an unseasonably cool July Sunday.
Back at it tomorrow.
Blessings to all!

A Good Day.

I think today I got my brain back.
Chemo definitely did something weird and insidious to it.
Felt like myself again. Myself with a still sore, but not horribly sore, mouth, but myself.

The start was a bit odd . . .
Woke up to rain . . and a toothache.
Toothache put on hold with ibuprofen, after a consult with Dr. L - sorry, Doc, it was a bit early for a Saturday, but I needed to get a plan in place for the tooth so I could get on with the rest of my day! Hope your early morning was not upset, and thank you. I am grateful to be going forward knowing that whatever dental work might be required I am in OK shape to take it on. If the tooth still is aching on Monday, I get to call the dentist just like a normal person.

Rain was NOT enough to stop the ball game!
The boys won, but it was a squeaker. They needed a dose of humility after four blow-out wins.
I got to enjoy brunch! Bacon! two kinds of Cheesy Potatoes! Sausage! Bits of muffins and stuff. Yum.

Thought I would need a nap after all that, but finally realized I was not sleeping.
Went to the office and got a TON of stuff done! That's when I was sure chemo-brain was gone, and my appetite for work was back.
Might even take a shot at working when the rest of the people are there - for a few hours, anyway.

Tomorrow is the District 4 Little League Majors Championship Game!
3PM, Alpenrose Main.
We will be playing for the right to play in the Oregon State Tournament in Bend, starting next weekend.
Go Murrayhill All Stars!! Play Like Champions!

The Lord watches over you - the Lord is your shade at your right hand;

The sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.

The Lord will keep you from all harm - he will watch over your life;

The Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forever more.

Psalm 121:5-8

Friday!

Number 9 over, done, and slept off.
A lot of previous sleeping had to do with chemo, I think.
Tonight I am able to reflect back on last Friday, and that sludgy feeling I had from the chemo. Insidious, now gone.
Mouth sores are improving. I'm back to potatoes and eggs.
Wonder if I'll be able to enjoy some of the potluck brunch before tomorrow's ball game?
If you're in the area and want to stop by, first pitch is set for 11AM, Alpenrose Main.
Have not been in to work all week. Have done some from home, but not as much as I had hoped. Remote connection has been funky. Will try to go in tomorrow after the game and a rest. I still don't feel up to working in the full bore work environment with multitasking and on the spot trouble shooting. - we'll see . . .
Work sent flowers. They are definitely a day brightener, and every so often their scent wafts by my nose. Thanks, work! Hope to stop in for a visit (purely social!) next week. Will there be pizza? Kris visit? Sabrina visit?
My nose, by the way, has become several degrees more sensitive. Really do not like the smell of Anni's litter box.

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.

Colossians 3:15

Treatments, Gifts, and Stars

Eight radiation treatments done.
Mouth sores are better? Slightly?
Not enough for me to expand my diet, although God, in His mercy, keeps leading me to new nourishing liquid delights! Back when I lived in Ashland, 11 years ago, a favorite treat was chocolate Rice Dream. Up here I could never find Rice Dream in chocolate. Only vanilla, which I never thought was very good at all. Well, today, what should be sitting on the shelf at New Seasons, near the peach nectar which I was craving? Chocolate Rice Dream!! Brought it home and practically chugged down a pint of the stuff. And it was just as good as it was eleven years ago, only, again, now I have no worries about getting fat from it! And that is a gift!

Baseball boys had a short, sweet practice. Their 'little brothers', the MurrayHill 11 yr old All Stars won the State title tonight. After experiencing a rather devastating loss (9-1) in their very first game, they came back to hand their opponent tonight a similar fate, 14-0. These kids played spring ball with the 12 year olds and we've known them for several years. Next year will be their run at the 'big kahuna'. Way to shine, All Stars!

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

James 1:17

Baseball Winners, Treatments on course

Boys had two decisive wins, one yesterday and again tonight.
Thank you for praying - I was able to enjoy both games, although I did a lot more hand clapping and a lot less yelling. Also, I have been forgoing the wonderful potlucks the parents put on before the games. There's always a compensation though - I would be so worried about putting on weight from them.
The team will now be playing in the District 4 semifinals on Saturday.
I'm sure there will be no rest for the boys - practice as usual on Thursday and Friday.

I have bagged radiation treatments #6 and 7.
Yesterday both docs declared that everything is going as it should. Thank you, God.
Mouth sores have become more painful, so I bought a prescription grade numbing medicine for them.
Hopefully they will begin to lessen in a day or two. I long to crunch something.
However, I can't complain about butternut squash soup with a large dollop of sour cream on it! Yummers.

Wowl There is just time to close this out and send a notification to all of you. Then it will be time for my mouth nummie med. (Every 2 hours as needed.) Needed. Definitely needed.
Then bed. Wow, and praise God, I have not yet had a bad night's sleep during treatment.

Praise the Lord, for the Lord is good, sing praise to his name, for that is pleasant.

Psalm 135:3

Keep Your Mouth Shut. Sleep.

I talked with an oncology nurse today who said that the sores are a side effect of the 4 day drip, and they will most likely be with me for 4 days. And the best defense IS to keep my mouth shut! No talking. Worked from home by text and email. Don't want to venture into the office and get tempted to use my mouth. I paid a price for just joking with the techs at radiation for a few minutes.

Tomorrow is my weekly visit with Dr H for radiation checkup, and Dr L for chemo checkup. There will be blood work done to make sure everything is as it should be. They will even give me extra fluids if I need them because guzzling water just ain't the fun activity it was three days ago. Fortunately, my taste buds are OK! Enjoyed eating three potatoes, two eggs, and yogurt, sour cream and cheese over the course of the day. May top it all off with a peach/yogurt smoothie. Yep, better do that, or I will be lying in my bed, hungry.

The boys are having a day off from games, but not practice. They are at it as I write.
Next game will be at 5pm tomorrow.
I would appreciate any little prayers asking that I be given the energy to visit with the docs AND enjoy the game after. Oh no! I'm supposed to keep my mouth shut??? We'll see how that goes.
Maybe I won't post tomorrow - might need to come home, have a smoothie, and go straight to bed.

 You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you.

Psalm 86:5

Top o' the Morning! and Later.

Hooray for Murray Hill Little League All Stars! They have logged another win, 12-4 over Sun Creek. There were 3 home runs, one a grand slam, and one huge long ball that we all knew was gone the minute it left the bat.
The mom's put together a lovely potluck picnic brunch to enjoy before the game on a perfect summer morning.

The afternoon, however, threw a curve. Mouth sores. Rather suddenly my entire mouth became one with soreness. I remembered I could use the special mouthwash and it helped, but mouth soreness is still the overriding event of the day, and smoothies have become the food of choice. The chemo drip may be over, but the side effects seem to be continuing on.

Now, at the end of the day I am thankful for baseball, and my house, and my cat, and summertime.
Most of all I am thankful for my God who has revealed Himself to me, as he will to anyone who asks, believing, in His name.

I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile. For in the gospel a righteousness from God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: "The righteous will live by faith."

Romans 1:16-17

Play Ball!

Murray Hill Little League All Stars are off to a good start! It was a perfect day at the ball park - sunny and high seventies. Four of our boys hit homers, one of them hit three! The game ended with a brilliant catch by our shortstop of a hard hit ball - so fast you could have missed it - he then tossed the ball to first for the final out of the game. MHLL 14, Tigard 5. Next game, 10AM tomorrow. Note to church friends: I will be at the game. Um, it's a once in a lifetime ride these boys are on - we have to put up with a few Sunday games . .

I'm back up to 95% of my usual self - thank you God! Just in time to enjoy the game, and the pre-game potluck! My appetite has returned - big time. Major craving for potato salad - satisfied!

I think sleeping yesterday evening and all night helped immensely. I woke up feeling fairly decent - even though I still had the chemo pump at that time. The morning errands included turning the pump back in to St Vincent's. I think there is a psychological impact from getting rid of the thing. It's no trouble to have, but I appreciate not having to have it sitting on my waist making its quiet but relentless little pumping sound.

I am not being bothered by radiation at this time. I guess that one day was just my system being startled by the burn. I haven't turned red or felt sore since then.

Now I get to look forward to a normal day tomorrow - no treatments to upset the status quo - and another ball game to enjoy. I've had a taste of feeling rotten (due to chemo) so I can better appreciate a return to feeling good. And - I will be better prepared when it's time for the second and final chemo in 4 or 5 weeks.

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

James 1:17

Weekend

Weekend means two days off from radiation.
Saturday means the chemo drip is done and I turn in the pump.
Saturday means opening game of the District 4 Majors All Star tourney. (4:00, Alpenrose Main).


Now means tired. came home and slept 4 hours. I think that's a reaction to the radiation.

It is now time to sleep some more.

Thanks for your kind thoughts and prayers. G'nite.

Three . . .

Hey All!!
Thanks for praying and caring!
I am grateful that right now that I feel OK. Grateful because I so wanted to make it out to the ball field to join in painting our cars with Go MurrayHill Little League All Stars! and stuff like that. Looks like I'm gonna make it! 

I will probably post more on this entry later, but for now, phew. All is well.

Hooray! My car, and all the team cars, got painted! Excitement is building for the first game on Saturday - Alpenrose Main - opening pitch at 4:00 

Play Like Champions! One Team, One Dream! One Team, One Goal! Go MHLL All Stars!

9:30AM, July 8 - Good Morning.
Burp. Grump.
Ordered anti nausea med. Burp. No, I'm not throwing up miserable, and water is helping a great deal, but I am happy to take a stab at abating lingering queasiness and (oh no!) disinterest in food. The banana I ate is doing fine, but I am having trouble getting excited about an egg, or even a potato. So, I'm off to the pharmacy.
Thankfully, I am having no particular discomfort from radiation - proactive applications of aloe gel have that handled for now, but tired. Definitely tired. Will now focus on getting at least semi presentable for the outside world. The pharmacy anyway. I think I will come back here and let the med do its work, eat, and hopefully have more energy to get a bit more presentable and go to work, and treatment after. It's payroll day and Lisa hasn't been taught how to do that.
 

Two Treatments Behind Me.

OK - Two treatments are behind me.
However, this morning my poor little tail seems to be dragging.
Now I'm writing for my own benefit. I need a mental/spiritual boost.
Gotta dig a little deeper to get the happy juice flowing.

Chemo:
Mercifully, I am not at all bothered by the chemo drug dripping into me.
I'm very grateful that I checked with Nurse L to see if there was an upper limit to how much water I can be drinking during chemo - my concern being that too much water would dilute the drug. Her answer - No!! Water won't do that! Drink all you want! This is wonderful news to me, because I find that I want A LOT of water! I'm thinking lots of water is a significant contributor to good tolerance for chemo.

Radiation:
After Rad. Treatment #2 I did one errand, came home, made a yummy dinner (Ate too much?? See, friends, It takes more than chemo, etc. to keep me from loving food!) and flopped on the couch.
Alternatively napped and read stuff.
Could feel much of my energy going into the radiated area - pelvis - working to do damage control.
At bedtime, I noticed radiation burn - already - ugh. Put on aloe.

General:
Slept well, and slept in an extra hour.
See, everyone - I am taking good care of myself.
Took a walk, although it was a relatively slow-pokey one.
I am not at work. I am home, blogging.
I think now I can fix a breakfast and head for the office for awhile.
And see what the day brings. Yeah, Rad treatment #3. woohoo

Ah - I'm wearing a bit of a happy face again. Nothing like laughing at your own jokes.
Hee hee, ha ha, chortle, giggle, etc.

Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.

Fear the Lord, you his saints. for those who fear him lack nothing.

The lions may grow weak and hungry, but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.
Psalm 34:8-10

Heeeere We Go!

I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:13

I’ve been chemo-ed. I’ve been rad-zapped.

Little cells are under attack. Some are being killed by radiation. Many are being prevented from dividing and growing by two chemo drugs. The good ones will die with the bad ones. Cells that have short lives and are replaced often under normal circumstances won’t be replaced. That’s why chemo patients get mouth sores and loose hair. Those cells have a short live/die/replace cycle. Mouth has the shortest cycle, so mouth sores is the first side effect to show up. I have a special mouthwash that should help with them. Listerine has been sent to the back of the cupboard. Hair cells have a somewhat slower regeneration cycle, so I should escape with only slight hair loss – none noticeable to the untrained eye.

Radiation:

No issues. There probably won’t be any during the first two weeks. Then the burn begins to build . . .

Chemo:

Lots of action today!

Anti Nausea Med: It’s a steroid. Besides abating nausea that could come from the other drugs, its anti-inflammatory property is making the ol’ arthritic hip happy. It also could amp up your energy. Nurse L told of a woman who was up running her vacuum at one in the morning. Ugh. Earlier I felt sleepy, but now I do feel a bit hyped – blogging will do that . . .

Chemo drug #1 was sent into me over a 10-minute period. It was a lovely pale purple color. Still is. Mixed with B vitamin yellow, diluted by lots of water, my pee is now pale tan.

Chemo drug #2 comes in a pouch and is fed into a rather amazing little pump. 151 ml of solution is being pumped at the rate of 1.6 ml/hour. Do the math – it takes 94 hours and change to finish. That will be Saturday, about noon. Plenty of time to catch the boys’ opening ball game!

Feelings – physical and other:

Feeling just a little sludgey. The closest thing I’ve ever felt to this (waaaay back in the day) is a mild hangover. I keep thinking I should go walk it off. But the pump keeps pumping.

No nausea issues. May have felt an occasional oopsy feeling – but barely worth mentioning.

Drinking water seems to reduce the sludgey feeling.

I have NOT lost my appetite. Today, at least, I have had to apply the same portion control rules as any other day, with the goal to have 10 pounds gone at the end of this. I am giggling, wondering if I will not lose any of my urge to eat more than I should. I guess in these circumstances that’s a good thing . . .

Good news – I’m cleared to do as much of my workout as I want. The PICC line and the little pump are of sturdy construction and there really isn’t anything I can do to ‘break’ them. I had thought I had trashed the PICC line insertion site by over-using my arm – but as it turns out, not. Phew. Lift that sack of cat litter. But watch out! Don’t sweat on the insertion site.

So, to you faithful readers who have read the whole thing here, Thank you! Thank you for caring and praying and sending good thoughts. I wish I could hug each one of you. You are warming my heart, and making me smile.

God bless us, every one!

Tiny Tim/Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol

‘Twas the Night Before Treatments

Here we go.

Prepare for the worst.

Hope for the best.

Again, I find the best remedy for my feelings of annoyance, concern, anxiety and fear is to pray.

Specifically, to pray for those whose suffering is far greater than any I can expect from this course of treatment.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions, with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

Ephesians 6:18

As I pray that these others know the Lord is with them, and that they can trust His perfect will, and that they remember that He is using their situation in ways they cannot imagine for His glory . . a ha! I am comforted, and am at peace.

And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:7

Praise the Lord, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.

Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits -

Who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,

Who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,

Who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

Psalm 103:1-5


Some of you readers will enjoy remembering 10!! (can it be??!) years ago exactly as we studied and memorized this Psalm and sang it together set to music written by our gifted friend Martha.

All Systems are Go

Yes! Almost all the bits are in. The preliminary pathology report on those lymph nodes in my groin shows no issues. The caveat is the final report might show issues. However, it doesn’t alter the area to receive radiation. Only the dosage levels of the later treatments would be changed. So no worries with these.

Chemotherapy

Thursday a device called a PICC line was installed in me. If you want details, I am sure you could Google it and learn as much as you would like to know. It is used to drip chemo fluids into me, draw blood for tests and administer any other fluids as necessary, such as electrolytes in the event I become dehydrated. Quite a brilliant device, actually. Do Google it if you have a spare moment.

Yesterday the dressing on the PICC insertion site was changed. All is well. There’s a slight conflict of opinion about how much exercise is permissible with this device in. The team who put it in seemed to think I shouldn’t do much of anything at all. Nurse J, who changed the dressing today seemed to think I could do anything I wanted as long as I didn’t get the site wet from showering, swimming or sweating. Watch that sweat! I’m going with Nurse J.

The first of two chemo sequences begins July 5. I get an immediate dose through the PICC line of one drug, and a five-day drip of another drug is begun at the same time, and I will pack a little pump around which is housed in a fanny pack. I was told the names of the drugs, but I have forgotten them. Neither was one I recall hearing of in my limited experience with chemo.

Radiation

Got part two of the two part set up process for radiation treatments. The team headed by Dr. H is happy with their work. First treatment is set for July 5.

Spent some time with Nurse L who reviewed what to expect during radiation treatments. Compared to what I experienced with radiation for breast cancer – this will be nasty. Definitely nasty. Compared to what many people experience every day with chronic pain and other chronic conditions – cakewalk. Hold that thought. Revisit in 4 weeks.

Life goes on – or not.

I have two sources of Internet. This evening neither one is working. What kind of evil joke is this? I had a fine evening planned relaxing, doing all manner of Internet activities. Not to be. I’m going to shoot over to the near by rec. center where there is wifi and get this sent, and do some other odds and ends. Breaking news – the rec. center wifi is down as well! Oh no! Conspiracy!  – Unplugged! How about that! I accept the gift.

Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

Saturday afternoon 

Here I am at my office using that internet. It's OK, I was planning to get some stuff done here anyway. I've been a busy little bee today - did a full workout (watch that sweat!) and a full dusting of the house. All prepped for what I expect will be the last vacuuming until October! I can live with this.

Now to get some office work done, and attempt to fix what's wrong with at least one of the internet access programs.

Oh, and big thanksgiving for the first two days of July being absolutely perfect. Cloudless and around 80 degrees. Yummy.

The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.

Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge.

There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard.

Their voice goes out into all the earth, their words to the ends of the world.

Psalm 19:1-4